Monday, July 7, 2014

Were You Expecting Ze Germans?

Movie quote... go!

My friends and I happened upon a German restaurant in downtown Orlando a few weekends ago. We had headed down there to watch some USA World Cup soccer, as they were having a block party hosted by our local soccer team. Of course, neither my friends nor I are really into crowds, so I'm not really sure what we were thinking. But after a short bout of reassessing the situation we began to meander.

That's when we came across Schumann's Jager Haus. Now, it's no Willow Tree, but it is more quaint. It's a little more toned down, and the menu is a touch more limited. The food is just as good however, and the beer just as cold. And if you're not into loud polka music, you may enjoy this place well over the Willow Tree.

The food was awesome, and the beer was nice and cold. And you could get the big ol' 1 liter of beer. Due
to my fading hangover, I only went with the 1/2 liter. But it got me thinking... Is a big ol' mug of beer really all that great? Don't get me wrong, there is nothing more satisfying than hearing a mug pounding the table in front of me, because you can only put down 1/2 a pound of beer so lightly. Unless you're about to pound it though, your beer is going to get warm, is it not? Technically if you want tap-temperature beer (depends on the style) all the time, the best method is to drink it straight from the tap.

Not practical. While awesome, it could get you arrested.

The next best method is to take shots of beer. Just like in high school... I mean, college, when we did the "power hour," a shot of beer every minute.

Slightly more practical. Probably won't get you arrested, but it would guarantee the waitress to spit in your food.

Then there's the Coronitas. I'm not sure how many beers come in cute little 8 oz bottles, but these are available, and probably will get you closest to you having a consistently cold beer in your hand.

The rub lies in the description. They come in "cute" bottles. Hard to pick up a girl when you have a bottle that looks like it came in a "my first kitchen" toy set.

Then you come to the almighty 12 oz. bottle. Technically the most practical, as it is the most widely available. In my opinion, if you want to keep a nice cold beer in your hand, you need to keep the container as small as you can, while still being practical and this is it.

But now the environment is all the rage these days. Face it, smaller bottles does lead to more waste. The large mug o' beer certainly favors the environmental argument. Which does create a strange graph. As you go from most environmentally friendly, but the worst at keeping your beer cold over the drink of your beer (big ol mug of beer, little waste, beer gets warm)... all the way to the worst for the environment but guarantees you cold beer (Coronitas, beer stays cold, many bottles wasted).

But then the graph takes a jump right at the end, where you eliminate the waste altogether and drink straight from the keg. Beer stays cold, no waste.

Drink straight from the tap people. As the cops are slapping the cuffs on you because you hopped the bar and pushed over the bartender to get to the tap, tell them you were doing it for the environment.

I'm sure they'd understand.